New Roommate

Ok so she.s actually more of a new housemate and she.s actually my grandmother. Grandmother # 2 to be exact. Grandmother # 1 was my former roommate...and arch nemesis. You see, me and Grandma # 1 didn.t get along too well. Because of her my room smelled like vapor rub and icy hot for 3 years, i had to turn the lights off at 8 for her bedtime, i had to put up with her obnoxious snoring, and... oh yea, and she hated me. The two of us just could not get along no matter how hard i tried. She started out so nice and loving, but being away from her home in africa made her homesick, bitter and mean. She complained about me constantly, made my mom miserable, and tried to break up my mom and dad. You know, normal grandma things [pardon my extreme sarcasm]. Thank the universe and all the galaxies within it that she.s gone now, off to make other people miserable, and now grandma #2 is here to fill the hole in my grandmaless heart. The second she walked through the door i liked her better than #1, simply for not being #1. Now that I.ve gotten to know her a liiitle better, i.ve decided that not only is she in the lead, she might have already won. She.s funny and nice and easy to approach. To impress her like the bootlicker i am [to avoid another #1 repeat at all costs] i.ve decided to start learning how to cook and speak my countries language fluently. I.m also hoping to gain weight so she can stop asking me if i eat. I really hope we get along. I hate how everyone likes my brother so much because he.s so social and shit. I.m not antisocial but definitely less social than him. But it.s ok, i know the real him he hides from the world. Her and my brother are already kinda close [met awhile back]. Anyway, here.s hoping. Peace.

p.s.
Me and boyfriend almost broke up last night... we were reeeaaallly close too. False alarm though. He.s starting to realize we.re no good for eachother, he.s just so fucking physically attracted to me which makes him emotionally attached. Everytime we break up, it gets closer to the real thing. I.m glad that he.s opening his eyes to what.s really going on. But wen we break up for real, i need to make sure he means it and doesn.t decide to test me half way through the argument to see if i really want to be with him. [sigh] Men.