July Driving

So i.m sitting here thinking about how awesome it is that i started driving today. I.m 18 and should.ve started a loooong time ago, but i say the phrase 'better late than never' serioiusly applies here. I was pretty awesome if i do say so myself [watch out for my inflated head]. I can.t wait to get out there and start driving again. The sooner i can get rid of this shameful feeling of owning a car i can.t drive, the better. I turned down a babysitting beach trip today and i.m really glad i did. My aunts pissed at me for ditching but i don.t care. They can call me antisocial all they want, there is no way an 18 year old could have fun at the beach with 8 little kids and 4 middle aged women. It.s the fourth of july and i.m hoping to see some fireworks for once. It.ll be like their celebrating my great getting off my ass and learning to drive effort. I decided to try something today. I.m going to update this post at different times during the day to talk about what i did and how i feel. I.m curious to see how much that can change in one day. As of now, i.m feeling pretty fucking good. Till then. Peace.

7:52 pm

weeell, i wanted to go see fireworks in D.C. but it starting to look like that isn.t going to happen. Maryam came over and wants to play Uno, and i.m always up for a good game of screwing people over. The "boyfriend" has called my cell phone 4 times now...make that 5, and i have no intention of picking up anytime soon. I.m disappointed that i probably won.t be seeing any fireworks tonight, but i.m still in a pretty good mood. I.m not letting him ruin that. I even pressed talk on the house phone so no one [especially him] can reach us. And if anyone needs to use the phone, i.ll just turn it off, let them talk, an let the ignoring continue. I.m a spiteful little thing, i know it, and i kinda like it too. Make that 6. As of now, i.m feeling ok. I still have a smile on my face, but a sinking feeling in my heart. like the moment i pick up that phone, it.s all down hill from there. Make that 7.

9:18 pm

Uno was frikkin awesome. So much fun. The five of us competing against eachother, forming alliances, just being a bunch of loud african people. It was great. I ignored his calls the whole time. But once the fun was over, i decided to cut him some slack and return his call[s]. He said he had been calling for 7 hours. Funny, my phone said 2, the house phone said even less. Oh well, technology must be mistaken. It happens. I just started talking to him and i.m still ok, he told me a story that basically ends with him possibly dying or getting his ass beat at the end of the month. Whether it.s true or not, he was definitely looking for some sympathy, right now, i can only give him emotionless robot. I can try to pretend though. I can hear fireworks but i can.t see them. This really sucks.